hEAR mE rOCK

The 3 most overused phrases in my life in the last month…

1. “I’m going back to Carrabbas full-time for right now.” … This is the response to the ever so frequent question, “So what are you going to do now?” I’ve been overwhelmed by the amount of people concerned about my future recently. What’s funnier to me is the fact that the most common response I received was, “Oh well you’re still so young. You have so much ahead of you.” Thanks.. because at 23 I thought life was over . 

2. “That’s not going to help me fit into a bridesmaid dress in 6 weeks”.. The sheer volume of delcious food that has been offered to me is ridiculous. Unfortunately, I have the recurring nightmare that it’s December 7th and I have a $200 dress that I can’t fit into. So, believe me I’m making a list and December 8th shall be a day of gluttony.

3. “I don’t know”…  Sometimes I have just answered questions with it to avoid talking to people. But it’s a really a scary thing to admit. “What are you going to do now?” “I don’t know” “How are you going to pay for that beautiful new house?” “I don’t know” “Do you think they’re going to cut any more staff members?” “I don’t know” “What’s your next step in ministry?” “I don’t know” ” Are you going to leave Tampa?” “I don’t know” “How’s your family doing?” “I don’t know”…. those three little words that admit it’s out of my control. Those words that allow for uncertainty in what I’m doing. The idea that maybe I’m not the one who’s supposed to know… but… the peace of knowing I serve a God who does know… of knowing that just because things don’t seem to be in order doesn’t mean he’s forgotten about me… that peace… is beautiful. God makes things beautiful. Even the most painful, ugly and difficult things can be made beautiful when they’re a part of God’s masterpiece.